Bullying and Your Personal Power

Being a coach, I have become more aware of people who forgo their personal power to avoid confrontation, search for peace, and have acceptance.

These situations come at a great expense to your personal being. You become quiet, lose your self esteem, become confused, often depressed and find that you not longer know who you are.
I have been involved in such situations and have now found my personal power and believe and trust my own personal judgment. My “gut” feeling.
Starting out as a coach in support for single parents and stay at home moms, I often saw such circumstances arise. Many had no self esteem, had no drive left, they were so committed to their family that they lost themselves. And then were put in a situation where they are told that it’s their JOB and that they have not amounted to anything because they don’t have a real job outside the home. All they do is take care of the kids. This is part of my own story.

That exchange of words was quite unsettling for me. I thought of myself as a powerful, intelligent and superb mother and wife. Instead of me standing in my power, I let myself be demeaned over and over again. I wanted stability, I didn’t want any sort of confrontation. I just wanted it all to go away. What happens with this type of scenario is that it strengthens the “bully” and sends the person on the receiving end into more of a downward spiral. This encounter led me to dive deeper into the curious cave of personal power and trust.

Bullying comes is presented in many different ways in life. Amazingly enough, children who bully throughout their younger years feel the need to continue throughout their adulthood. This is the reflection upon many abusive marriages and relationships. The need for control and self preservation is so high they do not care who it affects in their lives. Sadly, this has become such an issue in our society that we have Special days to Stop the abuse.

With reflection from those past moments, I wanted to work and empower women, single, married, stay at home or out in the work force. For may of us carry these burdens from one environment to the next. Owning your power is an integral part of personal happiness, fulfilling connections and achieving your potential. You give your power away when you make someone outside of you more important than what you hold inside of you.
Noticing this not only in your home environment but also in the work place is essential for the staff, the coworkers and the facility in general.
Working in the health care industry, the people that these negatives surroundings affects the most are the patients. What I saw was a conflict with the employees that was not at all what one would expect. They are all here to tend to their patients with love and caring and yet, they have difficulty even talking to their co-workers?
So keeping with your personal power, your essence, you become stronger, more confident and your self esteem will sky rocket. This is a process and it’s a transition that will begin when you say “ I LOVE MYSELF”, and believe it.

These are ways how you give your personal power away :

    –Searching for validation by over powering
    –Wanting approval for every action
    –Losing faith in yourself Forget that you know what you’re doing, and you are good at it.
    –Any boundaries are lost
    –Any self doubt
    –Be intimidated by loud, obnoxious people
    –Be a victim of emotional assaults
    –Go against your personal beliefs
    –Attempting to please everyone around you

    But you can keep your personal power when you:

–Believe in yourself and trust your inner feelings.
–Ask for what you need and want.
–Believe the fact that you have earned the respect from others
–Be non judgmental. Do onto others as you would like done to you
–Spend time with like minded people
–Never stop being the loving and caring person you know yourself to be
–Learn to say “No” and mean it, no matter what the outcome

Owning your power means speaking your truth, honoring your sensitivity, and believing in yourself. Your life experience, education, personal relationships, and curiosity make you wise.  Always believe in yourself and if need be, tell the bullies to shove off!

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” Buddha

Nicole Gruendl
Life Success Coach



Comments are closed.